Dispel Monday Blues With Christopher Ward's New Desk Diver

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Take control of the office (and your colleagues) with the new Desk Diver. A timepiece devised and crafted with Romaric aka ‘seconde/seconde/’, it’ll help you traverse the minefield of office politics, navigate daily interactions and, when the time is right, control the boardroom.

 Dan in Accounts said we could only make 500 pieces, so get them ASAP and before EOP. Each one carries a sapphire crystal bezel and dial divided into ‘productive’ sections to remind you to go for a walk, have a nap, stab your colleagues in the back and, of course, indulge in a little ‘doomscrolling’ on your phone. For the absent-minded, the dial also boasts a Post-it note in a nod to those who can’t function without writing a to-do list. And on the first of the month, the date window displays a ‘coin’ emoji to remind you there’s actual cash in your bank account (for now).

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Based on the C65 Aquitaine and made from 316L stainless steel, the Desk Diver is pressure-tested to 200 reams of paper (200 metres) with a case height of 12.45 paper clips (12.45mm) and a lug-to-lug of 46.68 paper clips (46.68mm). Powered by the coffee shakes of the wearer, the Sellita SW200-1 automatic movement provides an accuracy of +/-20 seconds per day, perfect for ensuring that you’re in the office at 9am and leaving by 5pm (or just before, it’s up to you). As a bonus, each Desk Diver comes with a Delugs yellow rubber strap – for those days when you want to put your best foot forward/try to impress the boss without actually doing any work. Also included in the custom box are all the tools to keep the office ticking: branded pencils, paper clips, Post-it notes, highlighters and even board pins.

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